Thursday, November 8, 2012
30 Days of Thanks...Day 8
Day 8: I am thankful I'm learning the lesson that Closure doesn't mean Comeback.
Each year, it hasn't failed. Some individuals from my past (usually on repeat) seem to pop back up.
However, lately, some new ones have bubbled to the surface--a couple I haven't encountered since I resided in Georgia.
One of the new people, in particular, keeps talking to me like we're old buddies, let's play catch up...that type of thing.
However, I hadn't responded back because I was trying to figure out exactly what to say.
So finally I get asked the question, "What's your issue with me because I have no issue with you?"
This person wouldn't have an issue with me because I didn't do anything to hurt this person, but it did occur the other way around, so the question made me laugh.
The ones who pop back in think they've done nothing wrong or they don't recall doing anything wrong. They are the same ones who act indignant when you don't answer them right away or you give them the cold shoulder. I think that's the thing which irks me the most. The fact that a person can pop up years later (even up to a decade plus later) and act like their stuff don't stink. That just because the person initiates contact it means he (or she) automatically gets a place back in my life.
It doesn't work that way with me. Not anymore. The yearnings and desires for friendships back in the day --to the point where I'd be friends with someone, even if that person wasn't the best friend to me, is over and done with. I thought then quantity would be enough, but I kept feeling sad because of the quality I was getting.
I had to quit feeling guilty for wanting better.
When you start to want better for yourself, do better for yourself, you realize some individuals that used to be in alliance may be out of whack.
When you aren't about the foolishness, you can't keep associating with those who are because that atmosphere just feels wrong to you.
When you are about being positive, uplifting, and encouraging others, then it is uncomfortable if you have those around you who get a high from tearing others down.
I don't have to be bitter at those people I don't want in my life. In a lot of the cases, I'm not bitter. But I do know that just because I recognize a situation needs closure doesn't mean the person can get back into my life. It took a while to get to this place, but I am thankful for the lesson.
So today, to the person I mentioned, I'm finally going to say something.