Greetings everyone! The Unleashed One here. I'm taking a pause from "The Layers of Chronic Illness" to do some Spirit speak.
As many of you are aware, I was introduced to the concept of All Authors by Y. Correa. Because of All Authors' mission, its original one and its new one, I wanted to be a part of it in any way I could.
First, it was by sharing articles here and there on All Authors Magazine (now Quixotic Literary Magazine) before taking a deeper role as being an integral part of the organization. It's cool that I have a title, yet my passion is in the write and being of assistance to fellow writers.
What many of you may not know is that the connection between Y and myself goes deeper. I am not speaking of romance, although in society, that is one of the first images people conjure.
Personally, I know it fires Y up each time the question is asked if we are romantically involved.
As for me, although it is expected, I also find it disappointing that people are unwilling to expand their minds before automatically delving into that think space.
When I was seeking avenues for promoting Reflections of Soul, the way Y and I interacted symbolized a Kindred Spirit connection. Writing was (and still is) our shared interest. It went beyond producing great literature. We also wanted to support others striving to do the same thing.
Over time, we got to know each other personally and discovered that we had experiences that connected us on a deeper level than just our writing aspirations.
I rarely use the word friend. It is a title that has to be earned. As I've said in the past, more people consider me their "friend" or "best friend" than the other way around.
However, with Y, she felt like a best friend, although I had not uttered the words to her. We graduated from Kindred Spirits to Soulmates.
Funny enough, she and I hadn't even met in person. Lots of online chats. Plenty of emails. Plenty of phone conversations. Neither one of us are into video calling, although she's way more open to that than I am. The closeness was inexplicable and one of the rare times in my life, a level of connectivity I did not question.
When we finally met over six years ago, I would have preferred it to have been more favorable circumstances. No one wants to see a friend go through trauma or hardship. It was my now ex-husband who came up with the idea, and strangely enough, it was one of the smarter suggestions he had.
I still had some anxiety over how it would pan out, but I tend to have anxiety to some degree with new situations. After getting over the aggravation that happened with the rent-a-car and running late, I finally made it to the airport. When I saw her, the anxiety flatlined.
All of those signs I felt. I never experienced the embodiment of that with anyone else, yet with the way we interact, it's the only explanation that makes sense. A person who is your Twin Flame does not have to be a romantic counterpart. Not saying that a person can't be. I just know it isn't that for me.
Visually, we don't look anything alike, but we are reflections of each other.
I gave Y the nickname "Roo" because she reminds me of a Kangaroo. She is full of energy and eager to hop from one goal to the next. Eyes wide, always big picture, filled with a zest to improve, encourage, and help the whole. She has gone through some of the worst travesties in life, but there was this fire always burning.
To see that fire of spirit all in stature of five feet was incredible, inspiring, and healing.
It made me want to be an even better version of myself because I realized that external circumstances had come together and stifled out an inner light I once possessed in abundance.
During that time, I operated as if happiness, joy, architectures of fulfillment were like clothes you only wore to special events, instead of comfortable underwear that you wear every day. I had gotten into that sunken place of moving and doing without even thinking of what purpose it served. An autopilot of mediocrity.
My marriage was not going so well. However, I was not the type of person who ran when the going got tough. I was accustomed to trying to make a way so that operations could resume as normal. The toxicity of the "don't give up" and "ride it out" is when you are doing your damndest to save something and that very person doesn't even want to save what you're fighting for.
If I had not met Y, I probably would have stayed in that predicament for the long haul. I was taught that marriage was for life. I was taught that you stick it out through "sickness" and the "bad" as well as "health" and the "good".
What do you do when he doesn't stick it out when you're sick? When your Twin Flame knows more about how to care for you when you're sick than the person who made vows with you? When your mate prefers to save other people than to show up for his marriage?
This type of misery could not possibly be what The Universe had in mind for me. When the negativity of events reached its apex, I imploded and exploded simultaneously. He left, and I packed all remnants of his existence in a matter of hours. On my birthday, nonetheless.
Over the years, I think we have rubbed off on each other. I have soaked in a bit of optimism (although I am still more of a realist), and I have dared to look at the big picture as well as minute details. I can take moments day by day and I don't always have to plan everything out (though I still love doing so). I think she even possesses the secret to weight loss 😲😁😁😄.
Hey, I'm just kidding about that one ... reference my older blog post for that story.
Present Day
Just like reflections can show the best, they can also show the worst.
I know that at my worst ... when I've had my fill of everything, I go dark. I don't want to be around anyone. I don't want to do anything. I just want to be around what's familiar and not branch out any further. The TV becomes an escape. The bed is an oasis.
Y has been there through the darkness. She has also seen where they have become lighter in intensity and shorter in length.
She is fighting her own darkness. In this case, it's become an expanse ... a thick fog that threatens to block the light. It weighs heavy on her, in all aspects of her life.
However, just because I am in a different place emotionally, mentally, and spiritually doesn't mean that I will not be a warrior for her, as she has been for me.
It's not a Virgo thing; it's a Flame thing.
