Saturday, June 22, 2024

D.B.A. Entry 1: Carving My Own World


Good day everyone! The Unleashed One here, back with another blog entry ... lol. That doesn't sound as snazzy as "back with another video", but I'll take it.

This week has been a humdinger. First, the heat in our area is excessive, so it did squash some of my plans to be outdoors more frequently. Secondly, and more importantly, Gino (affectionately known as "The Beastie") graduated this week. Lots of emotions bubbled to the surface. I was very proud. Some of the things he was told he couldn't accomplish ... he could and did. 

Now ... on to the subject at hand.

There is this affirmations book I've been reading lately. Below is the title, and I will also link where you can get the book. A few affirmations speak to me, and I will do entries about how they apply to me.

Note: Illustrations used in this entry are from the book.

When reading these words, they made me think of a quote from my pseudonym Queen of Spades: I am constant evolution, never stagnant.

I primarily applied that principle to the pursuit of learning and my openness to other ways of thinking.

It did not dawn on me until later in life that this applies to all areas of life.

It's funny. When I was in my twenties, I mapped out how my world would look and in what order it would be. Looking back, I shake my head at how much control I believed I possessed when compared to how many elements were beyond my control.

My world did not look as I envisioned. At the end of my twenties, I did not have my forever person. I wasn't working in my career field. I was not married. I had no children. I was in a new state with no friends, only friends by association via my companion.

Near the end of my thirties, my world was further from its original vision. Yes, I had who I thought was my forever person, but on my thirty-eighth birthday, I threw him out of my apartment, signaling the start of our separation. My best friend and her son were now in New Jersey. I was still childless. I was closer to a career job but was a long-term temp. 

Just before my 39th birthday, two life-changing events happened. I finally got hired full-time, and I officially filed the divorce papers.

Just before my 40th birthday, two more events happened. My divorce was finalized, and I (along with my best friend and son) relocated to a larger spot.

My late grandmother told me that the things that once mattered to you when you were younger mean little to nothing once you're older. I was unsure what she initially meant.

Entering into my forties put things in perspective. I learned that it's okay to carve out my own world and change it as many times as I wish. I am my own author.

My own world consists of:
  1. Movement
  2. Mental stimulation
  3. Things that make me laugh
  4. Creativity
  5. Playing games
  6. Meaningful melodic music
  7. Things that make me think
  8. Reading and/or audiobooks
  9. Solo drives
  10. Good scents
  11. Interacting with loved ones
  12. Conflict resolution without chaos
  13. Everyday peace
  14. Watching good shows and movies
  15. Good food
  16. Getting great sleep
  17. Pain(less) or pain-free days
  18. Awesome coffee

To the thrill-seekers, this may be very boring. To me, a person who has gone through her share of horrific adventures, "boring" is the best thrill of all.

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