Sunday, July 10, 2011

Erotic Truth, Day 10~I Wish I Never...

10. A letter to the person you regret screwing .. tell em how you really feel…

Wow, I have to pick just one

Here goes:

Dear J,

I know that you can’t seem to get me out of your mind. For some reason, you want to hold on to the series of events that happened a while back. These are things I want to let go of.

When you hit me up the first time on My Space, I should have kept it moving. I should have continued to ignore you.

When folks kept commenting on your ashy arms, I should have thrown my insults in right along with them instead of giving you grooming tips.

When you were having difficulty giving directions on how to meet you that day, I should have recognized that as a sign we never should have dealt with each other.

I should not have been brought in my your charm and wit. I should have known there was so much more you weren’t telling me.

I could blame it on the pain I was going through at the time. I could say it was boredom and wanting a break from the regular. I could say all these things; in some small ways, it would be true.

Too bad I can’t blame it on the alcohol because I drank none. Then I could have at least said I wasn’t in my right mind.

But I opened my legs to you and I might as well had opened the gates of Hell.

It wasn’t until months down the line until I found almost damn near everything you told me was a lie. You weren’t single; you were married. You were behind almost fifteen grand in child support. You could barely read directions much less text messages because of your learning disability. Your maturity and anger management level was that of a twelve year old.

At your best, somewhat decent head game. At your worst, longevity isn’t your strong suit.

You disgust me because you had me morally compromise and I didn’t even know I was doing it until it was too late. When I tried to do the right thing and break free, you wouldn’t let it go. Then, she found out about it and harassed me, even though I had already decided I was through with you.

No loving isn’t worth all the bullshit. You didn’t put it on me that damn fierce.

I’m sure there are plenty of women who wouldn’t mind being your one night stand or your mistress. I’m just not one of them.


No comments: