Hello everyone. I hope your Holiday Season has gone well.
I did not do a Year in Review post in 2023. I was unsure if I would do one this year, but alas, here I am.
The last month of 2023 is a blur. Yes, I did Holiday things, but all that was overshadowed by the information I discovered on Grandma's 102nd birthday. Innately, I knew that Grandma was, as she would say more often than not that year, "hanging on by a thread". I already sensed that her birthday in 2023 would be her last one. I did not sense how soon she would be called home.
When I got the call a few days after the New Year, the long drive was made to see Grandma. By that time, the dream had started ... the one I would have of one's passing. The clock was ticking.
I do not know if one is ever prepared to say goodbye to someone who served so many roles. I consider Grandma (as well as Grandpa) to be my parents. Sure, there was a generation gap, and there were certain topics that we wouldn't see eye-to-eye on. They did the best they could with the hand they were dealt. I was appreciated, cared for, and loved, even when others lacked the ability or desire to bestow those feelings toward me.
Grandma waited until we were almost back in New Jersey to transition. She was looking out for me even then.
Tragedy brings forth all types.
People who have barely interacted with me in real life reared their heads.
People who stopped communicating with me made appearances, filled with apologies for neglect, and promises to step up this time around.
In the beginning, it was surprising, comforting, and overwhelming all at once.
All I had to do was wait until enough time had passed. That time revealed who was true with intent and who just wanted to see the spectacle.
One exit was unfortunate, but our season had been over for a while; Grandma's passing just confirmed this and made it easier to end the chapter.
I hold no ill will to the ones that went back to business as usual. I do ask that when I'm called to glory you operate with the same energy.
Like my grandparents, I've never been a fan of fake.
For those who couldn't decide whether they were in or out, I made the decision for you. I have forgiven, but I am no revolving door. You had the opportunity to demonstrate redemption but it was all an act.
My grandma always said, "Don't start nothin' you can't keep up." That can be applied in all areas of life.
My circle in 2024 is somewhat lighter. It's okay. Quality over quantity always meant more to me.
Scene Two: coming soon.
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